I don't understand and I don't have to

Tommorrow I will be in Mexico. I am looking forward to a break from my everyday life.
My life is not boring, I feel that it's quite the opposite. I enjoy learning and creating. It has been challenging this year applying for grants. It has stretched me and at times I feel insecure, old and ready to fuck it all up...
But I guess my HP has other plans for me. I get to show up for myself. It seems odd writing this about myself but my life has gotten clearer.

I have some anxiety about this vacation and the partying that has been mentioned. I have a tool chest with Program written on it, guess I better remember to reach in and use them when things get stuck. For some reason I have suspicions this resort may have some Alanon meetings. If there are no meetings I can set some time aside to create one myself.
My old dear friend C comes also from a long line of heavy drinkers. Her sister has followed in her grandmothers footsteps and drinks daily, she was such a sad girl growing up.
I don't have to fix C's sister P has a HP to take care of her life. I can have a good time and keep my side of the road clean.
These care taking nightmares bring back old memories in the past when I made some horrible choices due to my Alanon issues. I took the blame for way more than my share. Well enough for tonight I am looking forward to 100 degree weather the fog is driving me nuts.

Grateful
1. My program roots me
2. HP has plans that I don't understand and I don't have to
3. Things are just where they are supposed to be


I am grateful for my life today. Life is good and I am trying to keep it simple.