My posts seem to reflect more on my past today I want to reflect on this day. Today. This Moment
Today I went to the MOMA museum to see Kentridge with my friend. Amazing show
full of beautiful images and strong political statments. I related to the show of
Gogols abusrd plays, the nose for instance. The absurdity of life. Laugh at life it's all just a play...
Drove to pick up my friend C it was her birthday present. So sad to see her go farther and farther downward with her boyfriend. He drinks and more stuff surronds her in the apartment. We are talking mountains of stuff along with 2 cats. The place smells horrible and she no longer invites people in.
I want or I try to accept her where she is, I repeat words such as "I don't have to fix her." This is the gift I get is to detach with love from her. But I feel like I am betraying her if I dont say anthing.
It is so damn hard for me to try and not fix someone especially C I care about her.
But I think it is best for me to work on myself first.
God grant me to serenity to accept the things I can not change and the courage to change the things I can.
" When I admit I am powerless I make room for the possibility that a Power greater than myself can do all those things that are beyond my reach. In other words I begin to learn about what is and is not, my responsiblity. As this becomes clear, I am better able to do my part, for myself and for others, and better able to ask God to do the rest." Courage to Change
Gratitude for Today
1. HP has a plan for me
2. I have a program to guide me, it will never aboden me
3. Got a chance to sing at the Center today-Let there be peace on Earth
4. Went to the museum and expereince profound work
5. Laughed with a friend
6. Ate a great meal with my husband
7. Enjoyed my garden

"We canot tell what may happen to us in the strange malady of life. But we can decide what happens in us-how we can take it, what we do with it-and that is what really counts in the end.
Joseph Fort Newton

3.

Grateful for Discovery

This was an interesting weekend a couple of things occured that enlightened me as to how the program wakes you up...I have suffered from migranes all my life, where I have to lay in bed the pain is so horrific. With the realization that I have migranes and (not the flu, a cold or some mysterious illness) and can do something about it with medication is miraculous. I could feel the pains of the migrane settling in on Saturday, my vision became affected. We were invited to a party
and I wanted to go for my husband, it was his New Year. I called a friend and she advised me to take a migrane pill, the whole pill which I did and low and behold the migrane went away. This is learning to take care of myself. Yes it is...Yea Yea
this is just so fuckin great to have this gift and to give myself credit.
It is so difficult to live with bad health I am learning though to take care of my body better. I have be bed ridden for many days trying to recover.
"By attending to our physical needs, we go a long way to making our lives more manageable" How Alanon works.
I want to start and sock myself in the chops with why did this take so long?
But I am damn glad to have the experience, strength and hope of the program to guide me along the road of self discovery in Alanon.
Alcholism is a three fold disease
1. Treating ourselves well
2. Our Physical Health
3. Our Mental and Emotional Health
Grateful
1. HP
2. Program
3. Husband
4. Medication ( especially for migranes) just for today who knows it could be something else tommorrow
5. Laughter