Turning it over

Cold day the ocean is reflecting back a large chunk of sun.
The relatives have left for home at 9:30A and should make it to LA by 2:30.
It was nice spending time with them.
I admire their willingness to be a part of the family.
The boy's father passed away this year from affects of a serious drug addiction.
He was a highly functioning doctor he had his choice of drugs and most days took advantage of this opportunity.
Due to visa problems the boy could not attend his fathers funeral. My father crossed the RR tracks and was killed by a train on the day I left for Eritrea.
My first documentary project going solo. It took months to plan the film as the country had been involved in an ongoing thirty year war. There was no internet at that time it was very time consuming to plan. I too could not attend my fathers funeral but his image visited me in dreams in Asmara. I found his image comforting it gave me relief to dialog with him in my unconscious life. Today I can still recall his image from those talks. He wore a tuxedo and looked so handsome. He was sober the last ten years of his life. My struggles have added to my life it all depends on the perspective I choose to take. Some of my gifts have taken me down to depths of self but this led me to Alanon, and meditation.

M is a caring person I look at him and remember the struggles I had at his age.
His mother is the martyr which also disturbs me knowing this scenario as my mother jumped on the poor me vehicle. Again I need to stay out of detailing his problems.
Keep the focus on myself. HP is there for him and will never leave his inner most self.

It has been a few days since I have been to a meeting. Looks like I need to get
myself into the rooms and receive some experience, strength and hope.

I once viewed my life as a victim and was powerless over what life dealt me.Today I know I have choices and a tool box that is with me no matter what happens.
My program has enriched my view on life, I am a wider deeper person. Turning it over the HP. Going to get ready for a brunch.

"When it gets dark enough you can see the stars" Charles Beard