Sunday, November 20, 2011

Dry Drunk

Woke up to a slow steady rain, fog surrounded the hills. We need water the garden is drinking it up in gulps. Turned on the stove for the espresso pot to boil up the ethiopian drink of the day. My life was calm the committee began with it's wake up calls, I counted my breaths. I tried not to attach to the insanity that took place in my brain. This is one of my big struggles for the past year my negative self talk. Surrender to HP and trust, I also do the footwork despite myself.
And yes I try to keep a good sense of humor and laugh.
I don't have to figure it out there are tools to be used just for this purpose. The program surrounds me guiding me through the day.

I headed out to a meeting first thing to begin the day. A newcomer shared his pain of living without drugs and alchohl. He is filled with rage he mentions. As his share progressed he mentioned a sponsor is not in his plans or working the 12 steps.
I make sure to turn around to take a look at this fellow, it must be painful to run on a dry drunk.
How do I know? Well I traveled the same halls for a few years willing myself sober every day.

ANALYSIS OF DRY DRUNK BEHAVIOR The alcoholic who rationalizes their own irresponsible behavior are also likely to find fault in the attitudes and behavior of others. Although not denying their own shortcomings, they attempt to escape notice by cataloging in great detail the transgressions of others.

It's important to be patient with others and myself. I am a perfectionist and in the past would judge others at times harshly.
The more I work a program the better able I can take care of myself.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

I am very aware of being a dry drunk and am working on myself.
Especially the poison of negative self talk - I lapse into it when I am tired, especially.
Simple Honesty of the Recovering Alcoholic

Syd said...

Dry drunks are difficult to deal with. A good friend of mine exhibits that behavior which has nearly ruined our friendship at times. I walk away and don't stick around for his blaming and rages. He is also ADD which adds to his misery. Not drinking is just one part of being sober and recovered.

Annie

Annie