Freedom

The topic tonight was anger. The speaker spoke of his well of anger which bubbles up from time to time. He watches it and tries not to ride the dragon or be a slave to his emotions. He is active in his recovery and I have been given alot of support from his experience, strength and hope.

I turned my anger inward which surfaced as depression. I was afraid of my anger my emotions were deeply hidden. It has taken quite a bit of time to bring them forth into my life into this moment. My parents did not hide their anger, in fact it was one of the few feelings that surfaced constantly.

My father was a violent man, cars were wrecked, my parents hit one another and I listened in fear. Some nights I wasn,t sure if my mother would be alive in the morning. At eighteen I left and never came back to my parents home.

My husband a work-aholic is also an angry man. I would tip toe around his feelings trying to avoid his down days. If he was mad I was mad it was horrible and I felt like a slave to his emotions. It was one of the lowest points in my life the year I came back into the rooms.

Today my life has slowly changed. My H can be upset and some days I can step back from his

feelings without riding them. I practice the three c's and let go. I fumble and make mistakes but I keep coming back. My program is not about perfection it is just me practicing my program.

Sitting with myself frees me and allows me to learn to be present for myself.

Gratitude

HP is always there for me, others and the world

Learning acceptance