caretaking

Great meeting tonight. I needed a reprieve from my thinking. There are days lately that my old thinking has crept back and taken hold of me. Tonight in particular I was feeling very alone, isolated and that life basically was bleak. Thank god I know what to do, hopped in my car and drove to a meeting. The speaker brought up caretaking at a young age. This issue seemed to stick for me I have collected a few broken friends. What I mean by broken is they need some repairs and I am just the one they run to for treatment. Of course my part is I also am looking for patients.

Well I guess this repair center mentality keeps the focus off me and makes them the sick ones.

I am well they are sick. To be honest this character defect has been surfacing quite a bit these days. Alanon is a progressive disease things do get worse. I have a program that allows me to look inside myself to learn new ways of dealing with this problem.

My friends are pretty bad off and they do need some help. Working my program is also helping them with their problems.

Learning this lesson slowly with the help of Alanon. I keep way too much about their lives in my mind. Letting go and detaching with love is my next step.

It's Ok to have compassion for others learning to love myself also in my flaws.

Gratitude

1. HP has a plan

2. Working the program all else follows

3. My family is just fine which makes me happy

4. Dharma gates are endless I vow to enter them